Is Negativity Affecting Your Life?

It’s easy to identify other people who are negative and point out what makes them negative. It’s easy to point out how their negative outlook is limiting their life and relationships.  It seems much harder to take a realistic look at ourselves.  Being a negative person can be so deep-rooted in how we relate with others on a day to day basis that it goes unnoticed.

For example, when your version of the ‘real world’ is negative, you are trained to believe that whatever can go wrong, will go wrong and whatever can go right, will probably go wrong too.  You may believe that a positive outlook on life is naïve. This is the type of thinking that could make you a negative person without you being aware of it.

So how do you determine whether or not you are a negative person?

Here are a few questions to help gauge your level of negativity:

  • Do you complain? All the time or just sometimes?
  • Do you often discuss what’s wrong with the world more than what’s right? This includes the ‘terrible weather’, ‘idiotic’ government, ‘lousy’ economy, ‘stupid’ in-laws, etc.
  • Do you criticize? All the time or just certain people?
  • Do you blame? All the time or just certain situations?
  • Do you believe you have no control over most of your results?
  • Are you grateful for things as they are?

This last question is important. If you are only grateful when things go right you are holding onto negativity.  If you can be present with and see value in all situations (including unpleasant life lessons), then you attract more positive emotions.  Learning to see things as they are and not have to evaluate them in a certain way frees how we think about and see our world.

If you can go through your day in a non-judgmental, non-reactive way you attract positivity.  Making the choice not to focus only on the negative and to make more of an effort to see things as they are can bring more happiness and peace into your life and the lives of those around you.


Sara Kuehler, MA

Licensed Professional Counselor

Posted in Mental Health, Sress and tagged , , .